A Human Robot :/

I am trying to be philosophical in this post. Hmmm. Let see if I'm able to be one :/ 

Being a medical student, i kinda see robots everywhere. I mean a human robot. They learn and learn and learn and learn. Get a L.I.F.EEEE *high pitch. I mean yes, we need to struggle, strive for the best. But it doesn't mean you have study all the time and ignore things around you. Well come on, you're living with living, not dead organisms. Well I personally believe that you doesn't need to score 4 flats to be a good doctor. Yeah it's a bonus if you achieve one. But we need to remember that our intelligence differs in people. If you don't get perfect score, that doesn't mean it's the end or the world. You can still be a doctor, it's not that you failed or something. *But it doesn't mean that you don't have to struggle! Just don't be robot :/

Because at the end of the day, what matter the most will be your skills with people. Doctors aren't only treat diseases. They also treat the 'heart' and soul. At the end of the day, sincerity wins. No matter how good you are in theory, it doesn't mean you'll be a good doctor. Build empathy in you, and you'll understand the community.

Be like heart. Who pumps blood all over the body, to benefit others. No matter how small the heart is, it does not matter, as long as it's still working. The contribution that can never be paid. Help others, not just ourselves. Remember, "When you find yourself in a position to help someone, be happy because Allah is answering that person's prayer through you" 

Let's move on!

So todayyyy, i decided to be bright, shiny and sparkling. Unlike few months back, i was dull. Real dull. Frankly speaking, i cannot pursue medical course in Ireland, cause I missed it by ONE point. And that one freaking point broke me down for months. So here I am now, in India. I don't wanna talk about those sad moment i had for months, it wasss very heart breaking. i could even cried seeing the pictures my friends post in Europe. The thing issss most of my friends are flying, like everywhere in this world. To the beautiful, cold, snowy places. And I'm stuck in India -..- 

I went here reluctantly. And couldn't believe that i am actually here. Time passes, and at one point, I realize that "failing is not always failure". People make mistakes. That is human nature. And by mistakes we learn. Cause everybody is dare to fail, but the difference between the man who succeed and who does not, is whether he gets up and fight back or not. 

So, i made my mind. To get up. And fight back. No matter where we learn, the most important thing is getting the knowledge, not the place. And i believe that "sometimes on the way to a dream, you get lost and fine a better one". I really wanna make a come back. So here I am. I'm bright. I'm shiny. I'm good. I'm motivated. May Allah ease our way, future doctors :)

IB Result

Assalamualaikum. 

It has been two years since i didn't write.

All praises to Allah, my friends and I managed to finish IB.

To cut short, KMB thought me what life is. 

In less than 19 hours, we will be getting a point. 

A point in a form of numbers. 

The numbers that will determine whether the efforts of two years will be paid or not.

The numbers that will determine if we will be leaving or staying in Malaysia.

The numbers that will make us feel excited or down.

To be honest, I AM FREAKING SCARED.

YES I AM.

That's the reason I'm blogging. 

I had been thinking a lot these few days.

A lottt of questions came up from my mind.

"What if I can't fly?"

"What if the makcik makcik ask? nak raya dah niii, matilah akuu"

"What if my parents disappointed with me?"

"How am I gonna survive seeing my friends fly?

"What if.. How... But..."

Argghhhh its killing meee, I'm so dead.

I always questioned myself about the negative things, yet i forget.

I forget to be GRATEFUL to what Allah have given all these days.

Parents, family, health, friends, food, knowledge... MasyaAllah, COUNTLESS!

But that is what we are.

We are al-insan.

And it means - forget.

We are weak. We forget all the times.

In the dua', we always said,

'Bismillahi tawakkal tu'alallah'

Am I really tawakkal to Allah? (it means give all decisions for Allah to make)

Serahkan segala urusan dekat Allah, and you should not be scared.

Have faith to Allah Aizaa!

Because FAITH, 

is not believing that Allah can,

it's knowing that He will.

Anyhow, whatever the result is,

Redha.

Redha.

Redha.

Allah know what is the best for you.

I'm praying to all my friends as well.

Ya Allah, grant us with what is best for us.

Andai kejayaan itu yang terbaik buat kami,

Jauhkanlah kami daripada sifat meninggi diri,

Malah jadikanlah kami hambahambaMu  yang bersyukur,

Sesungguhnya semua itu datang dariMu.

Andai kejayaan bukan yang terbaik untuk kami, 

Kau jauhkanlah kami dari sifat berputus asa.

Kami serahkan urusan kami kepadaMU,

Kau kurniakanlah yang terbaik buat kami,

Dan redhakanlah hatihati kami menerima apa shj pemberianmu,

Bismillahi tawakkal tu'alallah.

If it's meant to be yours, from you it cannot flee.